If I Never Knew You
by green-eyed girl
Summary: Alright Lily and James are out of Hogwarts. He's 25 and about to be married. She's 23 and trying to forget him.
1. Long time, no see

Chapter 1  
Lily fastened her left pearl earring on and stepped back to observe. The black dress was simply cut, straight down to her ankles, with think black straps. The neck was a fairly low-cut square that showed off the dainty pearl necklace that matched her earrings. Her shoes were about three inches high, black with think straps. Lily wondered vaguely if they were too high. The heels made her 5'10. Her dark auburn hair was swept back in an elegant knot, drawing attention to her dark green eyes. Lily checked the clock on the wall as she fastened on a pearl bracelet and quickly grabbed her coat and headed out the door.  
Drumming her fingers on the steering wheel, Lily impatiently watched the old Lincoln in front of her, willing it to move. It didn't. The honking car horns all around her made the anxiety she was feeling only worse. Giving up on starting at the car, she settled on the traffic light. It changed, as soon as she looked at it, to green. As Lily stepped on the gas and the car charged forward, she took a deep breath. It had been almost six years since she had done any magic. Lily Evans now lived and worked in the muggle world, to get away from all the pain that resided in the magical one.  
For the past two weeks, the magical world was all Lily could think about, and when her boss call up and asked her perform for a business Christmas party, she jumped at the offer. Anything to get her mind off her restlessness and sorrow.  
And now if she didn't get to the restraunt in fifteen minutes, she might lose the job that was helping her to work toward her goals. One, to make it to the top, and two, to forget magic. Throwing the car around the corner, she barked in a handicapped spot, flung the door open and threw herself into the cold of December in London. Flying up the back steps, she hurtled through the door, and down the backstage hall. Seeing her fellow crew mated, she breathed a sigh of relief. She skidded to a halt in front of them and panted, "I'm here."  
"Good Lord, Evans, you're all hot and red-faced! Calm down, we can't have you going on stage looking like a tomato," said the violinist sternly. Lily sunk into a chair and gasped, "Is it really that bad?" She asked pointing to her cheeks. The violinist nodded. Lily groaned.   
Peeking around the curtain to see her audience, she whispered over her shoulder, "Who exactly are these people?"   
The violinist shrugged. "Don't rightly know. Kinda odd, they are though. Every few minutes I can see sparks shooting up, but I don't reckon, I can tell where they come from."  
Lily froze. Sparks? Could it possibly be? She peered around the curtain again, trying to place a face. And then without any warning, the curtain rose, revealing the musicians, and Lily started straightened up quickly, and walked gracefully as she could toward center stage.  
When the curtain rose, James Potter looked up at the stage to see who the entertainment was. As soon as the spotlight hit the slim singer in the black silk dress, auburn tresses pulled away from the lovely face, James mouth dropped open. Luckily, the lights had dimmed on the dance floor and no one could see his gaping mouth.  
Swiftly, he made his way back to his table, where he could sit and view her, take in her every detail, and listen to her soft sweet voice. A few chords were played and then she began to sing and James was lost.   
Chestnuts roasting on a open fire,  
Jack frost nipping at your nose  
Yuletide carols being sung by a choir,  
And folks dressed up like Eskimos  
  
It was simple Christmas song, a classic, and yet the effect it had on him was unbelievable. The person, who came and sat down beside him, broke his spell by taking his hand and kissing it. He turned to look at the woman who was holding his hand and smiling softly at him, as though he'd never seen her before.  
  
Lisal loved James Potter, more that anything she'd ever loved before. She was certain that James loved her back just as much. But when she took his hand and kissed it, he's looked at her differently. It was an empty look, blank and uncertain. It faded quickly however, and he gave her a small smile, squeezed her hand and turned back to the stage, where the woman was singing.  
Lisal admitted that the singer was very pretty. Her dark hair was swept back and her bottle-green eyes were enchanting. Her slim figure was showed off by the modest black dress, and she held herself straight and tall. And her voice was one of the most loveliest Lisal had ever heard. Musing, she thought maybe she could sing at the wedding in February.  
Glancing down at her hand still intertwined in her finance's, Lisal smiled softly at the ring. It was and extravagant back with three diamonds on it. When he had given it to her, he had said he had gotten the very best, because she was the very best. Lisal could hardly wait for February to marry her very best. The thought made pleasant shivers run down her back as she turned her attention back to the singer.  
  
Lily finished her song, earning a hearty round of applause. Stepping up to the microphone, she said tentatively into the crowd, "Excuse, me, but we've got a very special song for the not-quite-newlyweds! Would-" she consulted the paper in her hand and went pale staring at the names. Lily gulped and continued. "-James Potter and Lisal Adams please come forward?"   
A young blonde woman stood, turned around and pulled a man up, gave him a soft kiss and lead him out into the spot light. The woman was nice looking with dark brown eyes and the sun colored hair. Pretty thought this woman was, it was the man that made Lily gasp. He was tall (Probably over sex feet, Lily thought), had jet-black hair, that in spite of the occasion was messy and untamed. His dark blue eyes met hers for a brief moment, and then she looked away, continuing to speak. "A very good friend of your yours asked for a special song for the two of you." By this time a man had joined her on the stage, which Lily introduced as Steven.  
  
Lisal was delighted. That friend might have been Melinda, or maybe Susie. . . She slipped her hand into James's and place his other hand on her waist. James was still looking up at the singer, eyes wide. "  
"James!" Lisal hissed, all the while smiling. He glanced down at her, surprised. "We're supposed to be dancing." And then the song started. It was a duet.  
  
Steven  
If I never knew you  
If I never felt this love  
I would have no inkling of  
How precious life can be  
  
And if I never knew you  
I would never have a clue  
How at last I'd find in you  
The missing part of me  
  
In this world so full of fear  
Full of rage and lies  
I can se the truth so clear  
In you eyes  
So dry your eyes  
And I'm so grateful to you   
I'd have lived my whole life through  
Lost forever  
If I never knew you  
  
Lily  
  
If I never knew you  
I'd have safe but half as real  
Never knowing I could feel  
A love so strong and true  
  
I'm so grateful to you  
I'd have lived my whole life through  
Lost forever  
If I never knew you  
  
Steven  
I thought our love would be so beautiful  
  
Lily  
Somehow we made the whole world bright  
  
Both  
I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong  
All they'd leave us were these whispers in the night  
But still my heart is singling  
We were right  
  
Lily  
If I never knew you  
If I never knew this love  
I would have no inkling of  
How precious life can be   
  
Steven  
There's no moment I regret  
Since the moment that we met  
If our time has gone too fast I've lived at last  
  
Both  
I thought our love would be so beautiful  
Somehow we'd make the whole world bright  
  
Lily  
I thought our over would be so beautiful  
We'd turned the darkness into light  
  
Steven  
We were right  
And If I never knew you  
I'd have lived my whole life through  
  
Lily  
Empty as the sky  
  
Both  
Never knowing why  
Lost forever  
If I never knew you  
  
  
Lisal smiled contentedly as the last notes died away. That was one of the sweetest songs she had ever heard. She would work as hard as she could to get this woman to sing at the wedding. She squeezed James's hand, smiled up at him and whispered, "I love you."  
James murmured something too soft to hear, but Lisal was sure it was, "I love you, too." Happily she laid her head on James's shoulder as another Christmas carol started.  
  
All during the duet for himself and Lisal, James was thinking about a woman. Not his finance, as he should, but about a woman with red hair, green eyes, and a beautiful singing voice. If he never knew Lisal, maybe he would be marrying Lily in two months time. This thought so consumed his head that he hardly heard Lisal say, "I love you." He wanted Lisal to disappear and grab Lily down from the stage. . . James slapped himself mentally.  
He and Lisal had been together for nearly two years. He wasn't going to throw that away for a girl he hadn't seen for sex years, a girl who had left him with too many questions and not nearly enough answers. He and Lisal loved each other, and they were getting married in February. James set his mind back on the party.  
  
As soon as she could Lily rushed to the bathroom. She fled into a stall and bent over a toilet, and in her rush almost knocked over some little who was struggling with overalls.   
Although her stomach was churning, she wasn't throwing up, which was a good sign. Slowly, Lily reached forward, pulled down the cover and sat there, taking deep breaths. Once she felt a little bit calmer, Lily tried to sort through the event of tonight so far.  
She had sung a few Christmas carols, all right, nothing strange, about that. The real shock had come when she saw James Potter's name on the little slip of paper in her hand. That shock grew and grew all during the duet. She knew her voice had almost failed a couple of times. Steven had started to stare at her. Luckily, no one else seen to notice.  
The shock had full matured; when it finally registered in her numb that James Potter was engaged. That was when she ran to the toilet.  
Taking another deep breath, Lily unlocked the door and stepped up to the mirror. She was pale and scared looking. Looking down into the sink again, she cupped some water in her hands an splashed her face. The water felt cool and refreshing.   
Just as she was finished drying her hands, a toilet flushed and out stepped the nice looking blonde who was James's finance. The blonde glanced at Lily and exclaimed, "Oh you're wonderful! Thank you so much for that duet! I simply loved it!"  
"You're welcome," Lily said with a weak smile.  
"Let me introduce myself. My name is Lisal Adams. Well, you saw my fiancé, James, didn't you?"  
Once again, Lily gave a feeble smile.  
"Oh, he's quite a catch, isn't he? Rich too!" she giggled. "Anyway, we're getting married in February, and I want you to sing for the wedding! Please say you will!" Lisal implored, gazing at Lily and widening her brown eyes.  
"Er. . ."  
"Wonderful! I knew you'd say yes! I've already got your number from one of the band members I'll be contacting you shortly." With this said Lisal gave Lily a quick hug and disappeared from the bathroom.  
Lily stood frozen for a moment and ten, clapping a hand over her mouth, rushed into the stall again  
  
That night, Lily stumbled home, barely awake. She fumbled trying to unlock her apartment door. The lock clicked and Lily nearly fell into the room. She headed immediately for the bedroom to remove her shoes, ("Damn things! Probably broke my ankle!") When she had checked to make sure all bones were intact, she wearily made her way into the bathroom to draw up a nice long bubble bath.  
She unzipped the dress and it fell smoothly to the floor. Sighing in contentment Lily eased her body into the hot, foamy water. It would probably take about fifty bubble baths to get the shock of seeing James Potter again. Lily though she could live with a bath a day for fifty days.  
Just as she was finally starting to relax and forget the trauma of the night, the doorbell rang. Lily groaned but decided to ignore it. Her caller, however, was persistent. After the fifth ring, Lily heaved herself out of the tub and yanked on her robe. Grumbling to herself, Lily stomped flat-footed to the door. This ha better be important...  
  
As the door opened, James was in bliss. Before him was the most beautiful sight in the world. Lily Evans in a bathrobe. Her mouth parted in surprise and those bright green eyes became even wider then he though possible. She said, "Oh no-" and started to close the door. James put his foot in it's path, stopping it.  
"I need to talk to you," he said swiftly.  
"Do you know what I did when I realized it was you at the party?" she asked, her voice low.  
"I have no idea."  
"I ran into the bathroom and threw up my dinner!" she yelled and this, catching him off guard, she slammed the door shut.  
He winced "Ouch. . ." he mutter. Then realizing the door had been shut in his face, he rang the bell again.  
"Go away!" came the muffled reply.  
"No! I need to talk to you! Let me in!"  
"NO!"  
"Lily Evans! Open the damn door!" he yelled so loud an old lady a few door down poked her head around the corner. James smiled sweetly at her, and turned back to pounding on Lily's door.  
"You're going to break down my door!"  
"So let me in!"  
She relented at last. Opening the door a crack, she said suspiciously, "What do you want?"  
"I told you. We nee to talk."  
"So talk."  
James sighed. "Can I come in?" She glared at him, but allowed him admittance. She closed the door quickly behind him, as though she didn't want her neighbors to see him. She turned to face him, arms crossed.   
"I'm getting married."  
"I know."  
"Oh." There was an uncomfortable silence.  
"Er. . . thanks for the duet. Lisal loved it."  
"I'm glad."  
"Not very talkative are you?"  
"No." This one stumped James. He sighed. No more beating around the bush.  
"Lily, why'd you leave?"  
"Leave what?"  
"Me."  
"Because I had to."  
"Why?"  
"Listen, James it's late. You probably have work tomorrow, and I know I do. I'll see you later, besides, my bath is getting cold."  
James sighed again and headed for the door, followed by Lily. Just as he stepped out into the hall, and she was about to close the door, she whispered, "Lisal is very lucky," and the door clicked shut.  
James stood there wondering how exactly Lily Evans had slipped through his fingers yet again. Slowly he started his car and began the drive home.  
  
Lisal slipped into her silk nightdress, wondering where James as. He said he was going to the store. That had been half and hour ago. Lisal wasn't worried. James had always been very faithful. She yawned, crawled into bed and turned out the light.  
  
Meanwhile, James was sitting at exactly the same light Lily had three hours before. But when the light changed, he didn't go straight. He turned left.  
  
Sirius Black stumbled to the door, half asleep, wondering whom on earth would be pounding on his door so late at night. Looking out a window as he passed, he saw it wasn't the full, so it wouldn't Remus. Might be Peter, scared something was in his apartment. Still yawning, Sirius undid the chain lock and pulled open the door. It was James Potter Sirius blinked blearily at him.  
"'Lo James," he muttered. James stepped in and Sirius closed the door.  
"Do you remember Lily Evans?" he asked abruptly..  
"Your old 'flame'?"  
"Exactly."  
"Sure I do. It's hard to forget girls like th-that." Sirius said yawning.  
"Well, I found her." Sirius froze mid-yawn.  
"How?" he asked, wide-awake now. James explained all about the party and how he found her house.  
"Well," said Sirius. "What are you going to tell Lisal?"  
"What do you mean?"  
"How are you going to tell her you're not going to marry her?"  
James looked aghast. "Of course I'm still going to marry her! We've been together for two years. Just because Lily turned up all of a sudden - besides, she's the one who left me, remember! It was her fault!"  
"Yeah, but you didn't go after her. That's your fault."  
"What are you talking about?"  
"Women like to be sought after. Maybe she was testing you. IF she was, you failed miserably."  
"Sirius!"  
"It's true. If you had gone after her, it might be Lily who you're marrying n February."  
James thought about that. The sight of Lily in a wedding dress made him feel nice and warm all over. "So what do I do?"  
"Dump Lisal and go after Lily," said Sirius as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.  
"Sirius!" exclaimed James again." I love Lisal!"  
"Do you really?" This left James feeling more confused then before, and Sirius headed back to bed.  
  
When Lisal finally heard the door open, it was 11:30. It was James. He didn't have any grocery bags. 


	2. Romeo and Juliet

Ok, here's CHAPTER2. Sorry about the font. I'm not quite sure what's going on. Should be less typos then last time. Sorry about the last chapter. The format was screwy. Well, enjoy!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 2  
Romeo and Juliet  
  
  
Lisal had always been an early riser. When she first opened her eyes at 7:30 a.m. She turned toward her husband to be. Unlike herself, James never got up earlier then 10:00 if he could help it. Lisal smiled down at him, brushing a jet-black strand of hair from out of his eye. He had fallen asleep with his glasses on again. Laughing quietly to herself, Lisal gently removed them. He turned over murmuring, "lil. . ." She supposed he got S and L mixed up.  
She hopped out of bed and began to dress. Today was the day she had to do all her Christmas wrapping. Lisal always bought Christmas present during the late summer months, so she wouldn't have to bother buying now. She loved to wrap them however. Since it was safe to say that James would be asleep for another two and a half hours, it was the perfect time to wrap his. Lisal dressed in her most comfortable jeans and pulled her long blonde hair back with the sliver hair barrette James had given her for their 1year anniversary. She gave the sleeping James one last smile, before heading out to the living room to wrap his presents.   
  
Sirius Black set out early the next morning, around nine. He swiftly made his solitary way through the city of London, whose streets were crowded with late Christmas shoppers. Weaving his way in and out, he soon reached a respectable looking apartment building. Grinning, he walked inside.  
  
When Lily Evans heard the knock on her door, the next morning at nine, she thought for a minute it might be James back again. But no, James always rang the doorbell. Wondering sleepily who her early morning visitor was, Lily trudged through the living room to answer the door.   
Cautiously, she opened it. On the threshold stood a tall man with should her length black hair pulled into a ponytail. His deep brown eyes smiled at her as he said in a deep voice,  
"Is Ms. Lily Evans at home?"  
"Sirius!" she cried as she jumped on him, throwing her arms around his neck and giving him a big kiss on the cheek.  
"Hey Lils!" he answered, returning her hug. After a moment or two, she let go and looked up at him with shining eyes.  
"C'mon in!" she pulled him inside and gave him another fierce hug. "Oh, I've missed you!"  
"I've missed you took, Hook!" he replied, using her old nickname. It had come about when, tired of being called TigerLily, she had asked for a new name. Remus who was reading a book full of muggle fairy tales for muggle studies, turned to the page entitled 'Peter Pan', and showed them the picture of a young Indian girl, named TigerLily, being kidnapped by a pirate named Hook. Lily had immediately christened herself 'Hook'.  
Lily laughed and asked if he wanted any coffee. Sirius agreed and she disappeared into the kitchen. Sirius settled himself of the couch and looked around. The living room was medium sized and cozy looking. Pictures adorned every wall and shelf. Pictures of himself, Remus and Peter. Pictures of her family and friends. But - (Sirius frowned) no pictures of James. There were a few candles in silver holders, a small coffee table with about ten books piled on it. Sirius smiled. Lily loved to read. The room was neat and tidy, and besides the pictures of him, Remus, and Peter, held no sign that Lily was a witch.   
He heard footsteps coming back his way. It was Lily returning with mugs of steaming coffee. She handed him one and gently cupped hers in her hands as though warming them. She sat down beside him.   
"So what's up?" she asked him, taking a sip.  
"James," he said setting down his own mug and looking her straight in the eye.  
She lowered her eyes back to the dark brown liquid. "What about him?" she asked softly, taking another sip.  
"He's getting married,"  
"I know."  
"I don't think he should."  
"How come?"  
"I'm not sure if he really loves her."  
At these words, Lily took another sip and announced, "you know I think I need some more cream in here." As she started to stand, Sirius touched her arm and said softly, "Lily."  
She sat back down sighing. "Alright, you want to know what I think?" she asked. When he nodded, she continued. "I think that if he wants to marry her, good for him. I mean, he's twenty-five years old. He should know what he wants."  
"He should, but I'm not sure he does."  
"Sirius Black, stop being cryptic. What are you saying?"  
"Think about it. In the mean time, why don't you and I go out and do something, huh?"  
"I went out and did something last night."  
"What, puke when you saw James?"  
She shook her head, sighing. "You know me too well. Alright, hang on and let me get dressed."  
When she disappeared, Sirius shook his head. He needed to get Lily out more, find someone else for Lisal to fall in love with, sabotage a wedding and get those two together. And he only had two months. Well, no one ever said life was easy.  
Suddenly Lily came back out. Even though they were just going out to do who knows what (Sirius still didn't know what to do) Lily had managed to look classy. It was her gift.   
Her dark blue jeans showed slim legs, ending in leather boots. The cream turtleneck sweater and leather jacket looked almost new. (Although Sirius recognized the jacket from Hog warts) Her hair was tied back in a loose ponytail with a cream hair tie.  
"Here she is, looking lovely as ever," Sirius commented, Liking the small red blush that crept up in her cheeks.  
"What can I say?" she murmured. Grabbing her car keys, she waved them at Sirius. "Are you coming?" she asked.  
Sirius chuckled. "You think I would get in a car with a twenty-three year old Lily Evans? Thanks, but I'll pass."  
"Oh, come on! I'm a good driver, " she said, adding "Honestly!" when she saw Sirius's brown eyes twinkling at her. He laughing again, got up and followed her out the door.  
  
At 10:00 on the dot, James Potter woke up. He groaned and stretched. Blinking he reached for his glassed. Fumbling, he put them on. He could smell burnt toast. Lisal had tried to make breakfast. How...er...nice.  
He rolled out of bed and headed straight for the bathroom. After relieving himself, he glanced in the mirror. Only then did he remember the night before. He'd seen Lily Evans again. He's gone to her apartment, tried to talk to her and had gotten kicked out again. He groaned again. Taking off his glasses, he splashed water on his face, trying to wake up. The water felt cold and wonderful. He dried his face and replaced his glasses.  
As he enter the kitchen, the sight of Lisal beating the air with a cookie sheet, trying to get rid of the burnt toast smell, greeted him. She stopped when she saw him and hid the sheet behind her back, smiling sheepishly.   
"I...err...made breakfast."  
He nodded. "I can smell."  
She burst out laughing. "You wouldn't think it would be too hard to made toast, would you?"  
James shook his head, grinning. She laughed again and gave him a good morning kiss. James returned it and then headed for the refrigerator. While he was rummaging around for the milk, and starting to made coffee, she snuck up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist and whispering in his ear, "I decorated the house."  
James turned to look at her. "You decorated the entire house in two hours?"  
She grinned at him. "Well, I didn't cheat, but only a little..." she said pulling her wand out of her pocket. James chuckled. Lisal could made him laugh, but so could Lily...  
He shook his head to clear it and went out to inspect. The little house looked wonderfully Christmassy. She had done a magnificent job.   
"Dye like it?" she asked hesitantly a few steps behind him.   
He turned and took two enormous steps toward her and said, "I love it." Glancing up he murmured, "What do you know? It's mistletoe."  
And while she was looking up, James seized his opportunity and kissed her. She giggled and relaxed into the kiss.  
  
Lily and Sirius spent a wonderful day reminiscing, (Remember when you accidentally turned Professor Kettle burn into a frog?"), laughing, meeting old friends, (Remus, I haven't seen you in ages! Look, Peter, I'm still taller then you!"), and generally having a splendid time.  
They discussed Lily's non-existent love-life, ("You know, Hook, that's not healthy!"), Sirius's jam-packed one, ("You probably take a new girl home every night!" "That's not true! Ever other night, maybe.") They made plans to spend Christmas together, along with Remus and Peter. (James would probably be too busy with his fiancée, thought Lily bitterly.)  
The day was perfect. Lily had not had that good of a time in months. When Sirius left her at her door, she gave him a huge bear hug, and whispered, "Thank you," before slipping inside. Sirius left in the direction of his house with as sly smile on his face.  
  
Christmas passed for both parties, with wonderful gifts, happy singing and toasting, glad game sand laughter. For that one happy day, Lily and James both were too preoccupied by other things to think about each other.  
  
After Christmas, Lily and her fell musicians played at some New Year's Eve parties, Lisal was busy planning her wedding, James was trying not to think about Lily, and Sirius decided they all needed a break. He called Lily about two weeks after Christmas with a proposal.  
"Hey Hook, I got two tickets to see Romeo and Juliet at The Royal Shakespeare Theatre down in Stratford-on-Avon. How about it?"  
Lily hesitated. She hadn't really been out much since her day with Sirius. But that day had been such fun, so she accepted. Sirius made arrangements to pick her up at eight Saturday night.   
That same evening, the telephone rang at James and Lisal's. James answered.  
"Hello?"  
"Hey, it's me."  
"Sirius, what's up?"  
"Well, I have a date for Saturday night. We're going down to Stratford to see Romeo and Juliet.  
"So?"  
"Why don't you and Lisal come along?"  
James hesitated. Sirius went on dates all the time and never invited him. There was something going on...  
"Please?" Sirius asked into the silence.  
"Sirius, you're twenty five, I think you can date without a chaperone."  
"C'mon James!"  
"I've seen Romeo and Juliet about a thousand times." At that moment, Lisal entered the room, over heard the name of the play, demanded what was going on, and then insisted they go.  
When Sirius hung up the telephone, she smiled slyly.  
  
Saturday night, Lisal was getting ready. She loved going down to plays. She loved dressing up. Her wedding dress was incredible... She fastened her diamond bracelet around her wrist, glancing admiringly at herself in the mirror. Her dress was a deep red. It had a fitted bodice and long skirt. Perhaps it was a little too dressy for a play but Lisal didn't care. She slipped on her satin shoes and adjusted her purse, waiting her James.  
He appeared out of the closet wearing dark blue shirt to match his eye and black pants. Lisal sighed. James only dressed up when he had to.  
  
Lily looked at herself, scrutinizing. Her dress was the same cream color of her turtleneck sweater and Lily was positive that when they ate, she would get ketchup or mustard of something on it. The dress had the same thick straps as her black dress, but this one was shorter. A little above her knee. Her strappy cream heeled sandals once again boosted her height a few inches. She threw on the leather jack (After all it was only a play.) and examined her reflection again. Her neck needed some kind of necklace... Lily rummaged through her small jewelry box and came up with a small green emerald on a thin gold chair. She wondered fleetingly if she should war it... She wondered if Sirius would know who gave it to her... Throwing caution to the wind, she fastened it around her neck and smiled. Perfect.  
When Sirius arrived, she was ready. Even he, who was used to seeing her, was speechless for a moment. He recovered himself and paid her a compliment. "Lily, I do declare you become more ravishing ever time I see you!"   
Lily grinned cheekily at him. "You sure look spiffy yourself!" she replied, tweaking his nose.  
"Ummm...Lils, we're meeting some friends of min at the play and then we're going to join them for dinner. Sound good to you?" he asked hesitantly, wondering if she saw through his scheme. But no, she was to busy locking up her apartment to pay any attention. She mumbled a vague assent and Sirius grinned.  
  
James grumbled all the way down to Stratford. He knew Sirius was up to something. All he had to figure out now, was what. Lisal was in her element. She was wearing some ridiculous dress that was meant for a fancy party. He had to admit she looked nice though. The way she pulled her hair back was very attractive, like the way Lily wore it for that party... James slapped himself.  
Why, why did Lily keep appearing in his mind? He was getting married! He had to stop thinking about her and focus on Lisal. James thought back to what Sirius had said that night.  
  
*"Sirius!" exclaimed James. "I love Lisal!"  
"Do you really?"*  
  
As they pulled into the theater parking lot, Sirius glanced over at Lily. He noticed the emerald. Were his eyes playing tricks on him or was that the necklace...  
"I like you necklace," he said nonchalantly, retrieving the keys.   
Lily let out a small gasp and her hand flew to her throat. "D-D-Do you really? Is it a bit much? Maybe I should take it off..." She reached behind her neck to unfasten it.  
"No don't!" Sirius cried and Lily looked sharply at him. "I like it. Leave it on." Slowly, she brought her hands down and stared at him suspiciously.   
Sirius nervously offered his arm and led her inside. Once they had been seated, he jumped up again, saying, "I'm going to go and wait for m friend. You stay here."  
"No, I think I'll come with you."  
No! I mean, no. You stay here and save our seats."  
"Alright, but hurry, the play starts in about ten minutes."  
"I won't be long," he promised.  
  
As soon as James pulled into the parking lot, he saw Sirius. He was pacing up and down on the little boardwalk in front of the theatre. When James turned the motor off, he looked up. Spotting Lisal emerging from the passenger side, he grinned. James groaned.  
"Thank God! I was afraid you wouldn't be coming! James, Lisal, I have someone I want you to meet. A very special friend of mine. In fact unless I'm much mistaken, I think you've already met her." He led them inside and down the isle.  
As they neared the front of the auditorium, James could see a woman with dark auburn hair sitting with her back to them. Was it... Could it be... Would Sirius do this?  
It turned out he had. "Hook, darling, allow me to introduce James Potter and Lisal Adams? But I think you've already met?"  
'Hook' slowly turned around. It was Lily Evans. James wanted to strangle Sirius. He saw her eyes flicker as she stood up. She shook Lisal's hand first, smiling quite warmly, James thought. Slowly she turned to him. James gulped. Then he saw something. It was a small emerald on a thin gold chain. James remembered that day as clear as if it had been yesterday.  
  
Graduation 1977  
James Potter walked proudly up to Professor Dumbledore to receive his diploma to certify him as a fully trained wizard. As soon as he grasped it in his hand, he turned to the cheering crowd, and waved energetically. One face stood out in particular, one with red hair and green eyes... James sighed remembering the little box in his pocket.   
A while later, when he finally found the opportunity to grab Lily alone, he gave her the box. Inside was the emerald.   
"Hook, I know you're only fifteen, and I'm not asking you to marry me-"  
"I should hope not!"  
"-yet," he finished. "But I want you to remember me. And I'll remember you. And when you graduate, we'll get married and live happily ever after and all that."  
"She had looked up at him with soft green eyes that looked...scared? They began to fill with tears. She gave him a soft kiss, whispered, "I love you," and disappeared into the crowd. James never saw her again.  
  
She shook his hand, looked hi, straight into the eye and said, fingering the emerald, "I do remember you."  
Was it possible that she remembered that night too? Suddenly, the lights dimmed and soft music began to play. Sirius made his way to the other side of Lily and sat down. Lisal sat down on the end, which left one spot. Right in between Lily and Lisal. James sat down rather stiffly.   
The curtains opened, and the play began. James watched it as though in a daze. As soon as Romeo died, he began to wonder. Would he die for Lily? The answer was yes. Would he die for Lisal? James pondered this and then repeated to himself that he loved Lisal. But, then if he loved Lisal, why was he so quick to think that he would die for Lily and so slow to think that he would die for Lisal?  
As soon as the play was over, James slipped into the men's room to take an aspirin.  
Dinner that evening was quite pleasant, despite the circumstances. Lisal chatted to Lily about the wedding, and Lily answered politely. When asked again to sing for the ceremony and reception, she agreed. James sat in silence and only spike when spoken to. Sirius joined the girls in the matrimonial conversation, coming up with obscene suggestions.  
"Lisal, picture this. You take your whole wedding party to Las Vegas. All the bridesmaids could wear short little whit thing with see-through lace..." he drifted off.  
"Black, get your mind out of the gutter," Lily said, taking a sip of water.  
"Oooooh, that reminds me! Lily, my cousin was supposed to be my maid of honor, but her and her boyfriend suddenly eloped, and no one has the vaguest idea where they are! Can you imagine?"  
"Erm...no. I don't suppose I can," Lily said, wondering what on earth this had to do with her.  
"So can I ask you a favor?"  
"Yes, of course."  
"Will you be my maid of honor?" At these words, James, who had been sipping on his wine, choked Sirius had to work hard to keep his mouth shut and Lily, who had been holding her water, dropped it on the burgundy carpet, where it fell with a splash and a soft tinkle.  
"You want me to be your maid of honor?! We've only met twice and you hardly know me at all and tank you," she added to a waiter who was kneeling down at her side and picking up the broken glass.  
"Of course I do! I know he don't know each other very well, but I like you already. I think we're going to be great chums, you and I. Oh, I think it'll be loads of fun, don't you?"  
  
At this point James broke in, his face very red from coughing.   
"Lisal, darling, erm...didn't we agree that Melinda would be the back-up maid of honor?"  
"Yes, we did, but I like Lily much better, I know I can trust her, Melinda isn't at all like that. Why? Don't you like Lily?"  
" I-" He stopped abruptly and glanced at Lily, who was looking at him with an innocent face. "I like Lily greatly, and of course you're right," he relented at last, thinking that it wouldn't Lily, Lisal would have to trust, it would be him. How on earth was he supposed to keep his mind on the wedding and Lisal if Lily was running around?  
Lisal turned to Lily, smiling. "That's what I love about James. He always says I'm right, even when I know he doesn't think so."  
"That not my experience with him," Lily muttered quietly.  
"What was that?"  
"I said, that's not my experience with men," Lily lied, while Sirius snorted.  
"So it's all settled then? Excellent. Lily, meet me Friday at 9:00a.m. And we'll have a little shopping spree."  
Lily nodded mutely, James groaned inwardly, and Sirius tried to keep his smiles to himself.  
  
When James stumbled home that night, accompanied by Lisal, he was in a daze. Surely Lily Evans was not taking part in is wedding...surely. But maybe things would be better in the morning. They always were, right?  
Whoever said that was sorely mistaken. As soon as James woke the next morning, memories of the previous night flooded his brain and he got up to take another aspirin.  
  
  
  
Sooooooo..... Another one done. Yes! *Punches the air* So tell me what you think. 


	3. A Little Shopping Expedition

Hey, Y'all   
Extremly sorry about the LONG LONG LONG wait. What with problems with my beta-reader and spring break (I just got back an hour ago! Went down to southern Utah, got sunburned, saw some hot guys, ya know the drill) So here it is. The long awaited (NOT!) 3rd chapter! Enjoy.  
Mamasita  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 3  
Lisal waited, tapping her foot impatiently. It was 9:02 and Lily was late. Just like James. It was one of his habits she would have to break after they were married.  
It was Friday morning and Lisal was waiting in front of one of the most expensive bridal shops in London. She and Lily were going to go shopping for the bridesmaid's dresses. Maybe blue...or yellow perhaps...  
At that moment Lily came hurtling around the corner, auburn hair sweeping behind her, emerald eyes ablaze. Lisal watched her approach with folded arms. Lily was dressed simply, whereas Lisal was not.  
A light green t-shirt and a long jean skirt looked extremely casual next to Lisal's smart red skirt and jacket. While Lily had on low-heeled brown loafer, Lisal stood tall in sharp black heels. Lily's hair was loose and hung down a little past her shoulders. Lisal had done hers up elaborately with a chin length piece hanging down.  
Lily stopped right before Lisal and bent double, panting.  
"So sorry...full moon last night...Remus...Have you been waiting long?  
Lisal hadn't the faintest idea what the full moon had to do with Remus Lupin. "Not that long, but now you're here so let's get started." Here she slipped her arm through Lily's and steered her into the bridal shop.   
As they entered, a tiny, tinkling bell sounded above them. A woman dressed like Lisal hurried over to them, bid them good morning, and asked if there was anything she could help them with. As Lisal explained what they wanted, Lily looked around. The shop was large, more a department store then a shop. It had two floors, with a gold railinged escalator, moving silently upward. There was classical music playing softly in the background. The floor was tiled, it looked like white marble. As the woman led them to a section showing flowery dresses, her and Lisal's heels clicking madly.  
The dresses the saleslady showed them were very becoming, but not quite suitable to Lily. The lady made her stand up straight, turned three full circles, lie on the marble-like floor, and sing twinkle, twinkle little star, before leading them over to the gold escalator and up to the second floor. Here she flitted from rack to rack until Lisal gasped and pointed up at a dress hanging from the wall. The saleslady smiled smugly when she thought about the raise awaiting her if she managed to sell the most expensive dress in the place. These thoughts were kept to herself, though as she whistled and a young boy of about fifteen came into view. He carried a hook with him and used it to remove the dress. Bowing he handed it to the sales lady and hurried off. She, in turn, handed it to Lisal, who held it up to show Lily.  
"Oh, I love this one! Go on, Lily, go, try it on!" Lily took it looking skeptical and gave it the once over. She looked even more skeptical hen she saw the price.  
"Lisal," she said in a low whisper. "Do you have any idea how much this dress is?"  
"Oh, don't worry about it. James won't mind. He's loaded," she told Lily in a confidential whisper and gave her a little push toward the door of the dressing room.  
As she entered, Lily was only a little surprised to see that the dressing room had it's own little powder room adjacent to it. Shaking her head at such finery, she began to undress.  
  
Meanwhile, back at the small condo James and Lisal had been renting, James sat on the bed, his back slumped. Was he ready to do this? To get married and love with Lisal forever? He was only twenty-five. Did he want to get married now, commit himself so young?   
He was fingering a little green and gold shamrock pin, rolling it over and over again in his fingers. How well he remembered when he'd gotten it.  
  
  
September 1st 1977  
James had finally gotten a chance to speak to Lily alone. He had been hustled here and bustled there by all the teachers explaining his duties and privileges of being Head Boy. It was now almost 10:00 at night.  
They were in the empty Charms classroom. Lily moved closer to him and fitted her body next to his in the semi-dark. James bent down to kiss her, but she pulled back, coyly.  
"I went to Ireland this summer."  
"I know."  
"Don't you want to hear about my trip?"  
"Of course." He could listen to Lily forever.  
"Well, after doing a bit of research, I discovered my Irish roots. And after that, there was this really attractive young Irish man who showed me all around-"  
"Lily!"  
"I'm only joking. You know you're the only one."  
"Good." He had gotten a little worried.  
"Look, I brought you this." She held up the little green and gold shamrock pin. Smiling up at him she said softly, "Kiss me, I'm Irish."  
And he did.  
  
  
James sighed and lay back on his bed, holding the pin up to the light. He saw the familiar words etched into the back. 'I love you' But she didn't, not any more. And that realization made him want to cry. 


	4. The Wedding, The End

This is it. The last one! *Sniff* Hope you liked it and will be hearing from me later.   
Mamasita  
  
(Oh yeah. None of this is mine. Except the plot. But you knew that.)  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 4  
  
The weeks until the wedding seemed to fly by. There had been rehearsals, laughing dinners afterward and still James was trying to make himself believe that he wanted to get married.   
Sirius was getting worried, as was Remus. So far,James had shown no sign he was falling for Lily. On the outside, that is. Remus once suggested that maybe James was over Lily and really did love Lisal. Sirius gave him a look so like Professor McGonagall's that Remus let it drop immediately.   
After the rehearsals, Lily would either go home and flop, crying onto her bed, or drew up a bubblebath and then cry. And once she cried while eating a big bowl of cookie dough ice cream.   
And then quite suddenly, it was there. The big day. The day when James would leave bachelor-hood behind him forever. Did he want to? James still didn't know. He's better decided quick, because he only had four hours left. James sighed, exasperated with himself, and looked around to see if he needed anything else.  
There, on his bed-side table, was the shamrock pin. He examined it, and without really thinking, he slipped it into his breast pocket, right next to Lisal's ring. Smiling softly, he headed to the church.  
  
It was impossible. Lily couldn't get into her dress. Well she was in it, she just had to fasten it up in the back. Desperate, she peeked out into the hall and saw Remus walking away.  
"Remus!" she hissed loudly. He turned around, and seeing her, smiled and started in her direction. "I need help!" she moaned, softly.  
"With what?" he asked puzzeled.  
"My dress."  
Remus looked startled. Lily sighed. "Oh, don't worry, just come help me button it up." He nodded and followed her into the dressing room. As soon as the door was shut and Lily had locked it, she turned around and he began to button.   
"Are you ready for this, Hook?"  
"Why are you asking me? I don't need to be ready. It's Lisal, poor girl, marrying a man like James." But Remus could tell she didn't mean it. She sounded as if she wished to be in Lisal's place.  
"I'm asking you because, you're letting him go at last," he said, his fingers working deftly. He continued as she started to protest. "We all are. He's not longer the James Potter we know, he is now a different James Potter, one that we have to learn to know. And I'm not sure that will be easy."  
"I'm sure it won't."  
"You're right. James is a hard person to get to know. Getting to know him all over again will be very difficult indeed. However, it should be easiest for you."  
"Why do you say that?" Lily asked softly.  
"Because you knew him best. He ever opened up to anyone like he did to you. Not even me, Sirius, and Peter. Maybe it was because we only knew one James Potter."  
"How many are there?" softly again.   
"Too many to count. And-" He turned her around, having finished buttoning her up. "I think you are the only person on this planet who knows them all." She stared up at him, looking...hopeful?  
He cupped her face in his hand and made her look up at him. "Lily, we all only want what's best for you and for James. And if this marriage is what is best for you both, then so be it. If not, then higher powers will intervene and make it the best."  
"Remus, do you believe in angels?"  
"I do."  
"Are they the higher powers?"  
"They could be." With these words, he turned and headed toward the door. "It's time I left. I have to go and arrange the programs. I'm still not quite clear on why you need programs for a wedding, but I suppose Lisal has her reasons..." He left. Lily sighed.  
  
  
The music was playing softly. The church was beautifully decorated. Live doves cooed from the rafters. Winter sunlight was streaming through the oblong windows of the church. Everything was spectacular.  
James Potter felt as though he was in a nightmare.  
From the moment the doors opened and the flower girl cam out, he had started to feel as if this was one really bad dream. A dream, from which, he would not awaken from. The flower girl slowly made her way down the isle, so content on mouthing, "Steep, together, step, together-" that she forgot to scatter any flower petals.  
The Lily came out. James was immediately transferred from his horrible nightmare to beautiful dream. Her dress was a soft green satin. It was off the shoulders, with long, silky sleeves that hugged her arms. The neck was slightly triangular and it showed off the emerald that she, once again, wore. (Think Disney's Sleeping Beauty.)  
The bodice was fitted, but the skirt was not. It was not puffy, it was not straight. It was a lovely combination of the two. Dainty, light green slippers poked out from the hem as she walked. Her fiery hair was done up with some long snaky tendrils hanging down. Her flowers were white lilies as pure as the human version. James could fell his heart beat speeding up and as it did so, it bump, bump, bumped against the shamrock pin in his breast pocket. He heard Sirius let out a low whistle beside him.   
Then the march started and nightmarish feeling came flooding back. Lisal was walking down the isle, beaming at everyone. She looked every bit of the beautiful bride. James gulped as she stood beside him. Lily stood up as did Remus, and they sang the same duet Lily had sung only two months ago. Remus had a nice, strong baritone, which contrasted amazingly with Lily's sweet soprano.  
Then it was over. The priest was saying something, but James couldn't understand it. He was lost in a foggy haze, with only one thing in focus, Lily, Lily, Lily... Then he heard the priest say, quite clearly.  
"Do you take this woman, Lisal Adams, to have and to hold, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?"  
James looked up, his mind suddenly amazingly clear. He couldn't do it. How could marry Lisal if he loved Lily? He saw Lisal looking up at him, her smile fading as he didn't answer. But suddenly, Lisal didn't matter anymore. Had she ever mattered? Weren't relationships about growing? Had he grown while he was with Lisal? Of course. He had grown to love Lily...  
"I can't." the words hung in the air, reverberating again and again, sounding very ugly. Suddenly Lisal gasped.   
"Why not, James? Don't you love me?"  
"No."  
She slapped him, hard, square across the face.   
"Have you just been amusing yourself for two years then, Potter?" she asked, her voice suddenly very hard and cold.   
"No."  
"Well then, what happened?"  
"I think I loved you in the beginning...."   
Another slap. "You think?" Her voice was pure venom. It's that Evans, isn't it?"  
James said nothing. Suddenly, he felt the shamrock pin in his pocket. 'I love you'. And he knew. He would die for Lily. Kill to made her happy. Starve to feed her. Be parched so she could drink. He loved her.   
"I'm sorry, but I can't marry you."  
Lisal let out an enrage scream and fled from the sanctuary. The silence in the air was so heavy, James could hardly carry it. Suddenly it was broken by loud whoop from Sirius. James glanced over at him. He and Remus were doing some kind of victory dance.  
Then his eyes rested on Lily. Her mouth was slightly open, and her eyes were wide. Suddenly she closed them for a while and then opened then again as if trying to believe what she had just seen.   
At that moment, the crowd began to talk excitedly and pushed to get out of the door. The priest left, muttering to himself, "Let's see, this would thirty-six. Or is it seven?"  
Soon it was only James, Remus, Sirius and Lily. Winking at James, the two other males left, still doing the victory dance. And finally they were alone, just the two of them.   
James cleared his throat and Lily looked up. She looked at James, as if seeing him for the first time, stood up and came toward him. She came very close, looked him straight inn the eye and asked, "Why did you do it?"  
James said softly, "Well, I've always like a woman with green eyes. Lisal's were brown. Red hair always caught my attention. Lisal's was blonde. And finaly," he drew the shamrock out of his breast pocket. "I've always had a thing for Irish lasses. Lisal was Norwegian."  
Lily smiled at him, it was warm and rich. Then she leaned against him, turned her face up toward his and said softly. "Kiss, I'm Irish."  
And he did.  
  
  
  
  
The End  
  
  
  
Oh my goodness. Lisal certainly got vicious on me didn't she? I didn't mean for that to happen. I think my characters are taking over my brain. 


End file.
